SERIES 31: EPISODE FIVE (586) Monday 19 May 2008
EPISODE GUIDES
Episode 1
Episode 2
Episode 3
Episode 4
Episode 5
Episode 6
Episode 7
Episode 8
Episode 9
Episode 10
Episode 11
Episode 12
Episode 13
Episode 14
Episode 15
Episode 16
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Episode 18
Episode 19
Episode 20

SERIES 31
Character Profiles
Helplines
Cast & Crew

FOOD FIGHT
by David Hanson

On the way to school, Theo daydreams about scoring the winning goal in the world cup final. Before he can net the ball, he's brought back down to earth when he crashes into a tree!

Grange Hill is due a visit by ex-pupil turned top England footballer and celebrity chef Dwayne Miller, who's here to open the CLC. Mr McDonnell briefs a tribe of volunteers and worries the pupils can't be trusted. Tanya and Togger take charge of the welcoming committee and Tanya warns everyone to be in the canteen to eat a special meal Dwayne will be preparing. Year 8 are not relishing the prospect of that.

Jenny thinks Dwayne is only coming to promote his new cookery book and believes fame has caused him to lose touch with reality. Jake suggests a demonstration; Jenny wants everyone to refuse to eat Dwayne's meal and throw eggs at him to protest about how he is exploiting the pupils. The idea horrifies Bryn, while Rachel needs some convincing. Soon, Jenny's gang are waiting at the main entrance with placards, but they are spotted by Ms Rawlinson.

Theo has an idea for his science project - to hatch chickens from eggs! But for that he needs Gyngell's help; they ask if he can get them some eggs from his dad's pet shop. Their plan suffers a setback when Gyngell reveals he's doing chickens for his project, but he agrees to get them some eggs when they promise "no chickens". Chloe and Andrea commandeer the camcorder that will film an interview with Dwayne. Chloe will do the interview himself - but plans to make Dwayne lose his temper on film. They have no idea Bryn is sat nearby - reading Dwayne's autobiography - and has overheard their plan.

Dwayne arrives with his minder and both Mr McDonnell and Ms Rawlinson are soon fawning over him. They proudly escort him through the school corridors but when Dwayne bumps into Theo and Laxo with their box of eggs, he thinks the boys want him to sign them so he happily obliges. Bryn tries to warn Dwayne the girls have eggs; Lucy and Rachel become starstruck and Dwayne ends up signing the eggs they were going to pelt him with. As an official photocall takes place in the CLC, Jake and his demonstrators try noisily to disrupt proceedings but only succeed in distracting Togger which allows Dwayne to get his paws on Tanya - prompting Togger to lose it and stop the photocall. Dwayne and Togger then battle it out on a computer game.

Jake and Jenny plan their next move in the canteen and by now Rachel is completely smitten with Dwayne. Lucy baits Jenny who ends up throwing the signed egg at her rival - but it misses and hits Rachel. Chloe and Andrea are now on the scene and Chloe succeeds where Jenny failed, but Lucy retaliates by pelting Chloe with a bowl of Dwayne's food. It misses and hits Andrea. Bryn corners Dwayne and again tries, unsuccessfully, to warn him of the planned prank and as he arrives in the canteen Jenny has planted a bowl of the green stuff right over Chloe's head! Lucy throws a bowl back at her, but it misses and there are stunned gasps as the mush hits Dwayne!

At least for Chloe it's had the desired effect - Dwayne loses it and pelts the girls, then Togger. A massive food fight breaks out with anyone fair game. It's all an unpleasant surprise for McDonnell and Rawlinson as they enter the chaos - a furious McDonnell warns everyone they're in big trouble and orders them to start the clean-up. McDonnell orders Bryn to apologise and this finally gives him the chance to tell Dwayne that he was set up by Chloe and Andrea. The two girls go to play back their exploits - only to find the camcorder has no tape in it - because Bryn has managed to lift it and hands it to Dwayne. Bryn tells Dwayne he's appalled by how he's been treated and they have a chat about their respective difficulties "fitting in".

Theo's eggs start to make noises and he wonders what's in them. As the clean-up begins, Dwayne goes back to the canteen and takes the blame for the food fight. He urges McDonnell to go easy on the pupils. In the kitchen, the eggs have hatched - into baby snakes!